The Long-Anticipated Rachel Palmer Endorsement

If you are like me, you have probably been sitting anxiously by your computer for the past five months, anxiously awaiting news from the internet to find out who Rachel Palmer was going to endorse in the 2012 Harris County District Attorney Race.  Would she go Republican?  Would she go Democrat?  It was quite a nail-biter.

Well, my friends, your wait is over, because over the weekend, Rachel's long anticipated endorsement was finally revealed as her husband, Don Hooper, forwarded an e-mail written by her to all of his friends. It quickly made its way across the internet and I received multiple copies of it from friends under the title of "FW:  Have you seen this?"

Drumroll, please.  In a move that is about as surprising as Squeaky Fromme endorsing Charles Manson in 1969, Rachel Palmer has endorsed Pat Lykos.

Now, I'm not going to post the e-mail in its entirety for fear that somebody might miss my sarcasm and actually think I agree with what this political "power couple" has to say.  (NOTE: It is printed in the comments section of my last post by a commenter, however, if you want to see it.)

I do, however, want to hit some of the highlights of it.

1.  The e-mail begins with a personal message from Don, who is being quite demure in comparison to his usual behavior (which reminds one of a feces-flinging Rhesus monkey.)  He writes:

My wife Rachel Palmer asked me to pass on her thoughts concerning the DA's race and I could have not said it any better.

Well, Don and I finally agree on something.  No kidding.  Don "could have not said it any better" because anyone who reads what he writes can tell you that he has yet to master the English language.  They say people write the way they talk; others seem to write the way that Yoda talks.

2.  Rachel begins her portion of the letter by giving herself a big pat on the back for trying a murder case several years ago in an effort to earn credibility with the reader.  She is ambiguous about how the case turned out other than saying "justice prevailed" and how that means she has wonderful character.  She throws out that over the years "a number of national scandals have tarnished my profession" yet fails to acknowledge that the B.A.T. van scandal is one of them.

3.  She never mentions invoking her 5th Amendment rights to a Harris County Grand Jury, but does say "I made a decision to rebuke their misuse of the grand jury process."  Yes, the same can be said for all of the inmates in jails across the country who chose not to speak to authorities -- they weren't hiding anything; they were merely "rebuking" the police.

4.  The e-mail continues on like a reading of Rachel's own personal Mein Kampf as it blames everyone from Judge Susan Brown to Chuck Rosenthal to the Police Officers' Union for all of the problems that she and the Lykos Administration have endured over the years.  She accuses Judge Brown of creating "a public spectacle" designed to "place a stain" on the District Attorney's Office.

5.  Rachel moves on to touting the "successes" of the Lykos Administration and defending the DIVERT program, as well as the controversial decision to not file drug trace cases.  Of the trace case decision, she points out that it has created a "significant reduction in crime."  I suppose if Lykos decided to stop prosecuting murder cases, she would cite a "significant reduction in the murder rate" as well.  She also notes that DIVERT has "reduced the number of repeat impaired driving offenders."  Mathematically, that's true, I guess -- you can't really be a repeat offender if Lykos isn't counting your first DWI, now can you?

6.  Despite the fact that the D.A.'s Office Policy seems to dictate that a prosecutor shall not use the fact that they are a prosecutor to endorse any candidates, Rachel is quite free in talking about how she is a prosecutor endorsing the candidacy of Pat Lykos.  I have to wonder how an employee who sent out an e-mail saying they were endorsing Mike Anderson would be treated.

At this point, I think the Lykos Administration has clearly illustrated that there is absolutely NOTHING that Rachel Palmer can do that will lead to her being disciplined or fired.  She took a bullet for them by pleading the 5th in front of the Grand Jury and she will reap the benefits as long as Lykos is in office.  There is no nobility in that, regardless of how Rachel tries to spin it.  It is the same mentality that the Mafia has when an underling takes his prison time without snitching.

The bottom line is this: Rachel Palmer is well aware of the fact that no other candidate than Lykos (in the four-person District Attorney race) will keep her employed as a prosecutor.

Okay, well, maybe Lloyd Oliver would keep her out of sympathy.

Palmer's endorsement is as worthless as it is offensive.